Thursday, March 1, 2012

Moving forward

The Purple Room up stair, used to be Ada's room. I painted it purple because she always has trouble sleeping. I thought by making the room darker might help, and it did. I painted it while Ada went on a field trip with her Girl Scout troop. She had a big Queen size bed so all her friends can hang out when they came over.
The past 4 years, I've been avoiding the Purple room. Ada and I sleep down stair and I have no reason to go up stair anyway. A few times I went in and packed her stuff in a box and put it down in the basement. I cried every time I touch her stuffs, her clothes, her jewelry, her diary, notebook and all other things.
I finally empty the room and asked Grant to come over and paint the room. It was not easy.

Now, Purple room no more. It is light purple-pink. Very lovely color.
I am planning to use it as my studio since I have so many projects on my table, there is not enough room to work. I spread out to the dinning table, but have to pack and put it away everyday. I hope being up there will help me be more productive and work faster since I will have everything I need in one place.
I moved a few boxes in today, it wasn't easy. I end up sitting here and cry about it. Now I am not sure I can sit in that room and not crying.
But life needs to go on, I need to move forward, to the next chapter of my life. Having a studio will do me good. I have many things I like to do and the creative juice is flowing. Time to let it out.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Oh Ponsawan I cannot imagine how difficult this change must be for you. I also cannot help but think that having a "studio" in which to create your beautiful art will be very good for you. Your polymer clay creations are so very lovely. Take some time for yourself. Caregivers need to take care of themselves as well. Thank you for the update. I think of you often and marvel at the progress Ada has made. You are incredible.

Anonymous said...

Hi Ponsawani,

I too cannot imagine how difficult it has been, but I am so proud of you for making this very difficult step forward. It is difficult, but, as you said, if you have reached the point of feeling that it is time to "move forward", then you must be ready. As you said, "life needs to go on". You are the only one who can make that decision on when you are ready to let it go and welcome the new chapter into your lives with open arms!

In life, everything is a process and processes come when you are ready. You are so ready for this! Things take time. Take your time. Eventually you will work there and not cry, but rejoice of the great memories and the opportunity to imagine, create, evolve...I am with you! GO FOR IT! I will just have to keep spending money on your gorgeous jewelry....me, the frugel one! Ha, can't wait to see what you will create. Love you lots...hugs!

Anonymous said...

Hello Ponsawan,
Just checking in to see how your new studio is coming along? Have you been able to sneak away for a little creative time? I think of you and Ada often and just wanted to check in. Hope all is well with you and your family and that Ada continues her marvelous progress.

Rachel Watson said...

I was very proud of you when I saw you in there working! I love you!